Twister

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Starring	Helen Hunt, Bill Paxton
Director	Jan de Bont
Year	1996
What it's worth		Second run (See it as part of a double-feature or at a dollar house.)

I've always figured that tornados are nature's way of making it up to the midwest for missing out on earthquakes and hurricanes. They're the same powerful forces of nature condensed into an amazing wallop. The problem with portraying such exciting phenomena on film is their nature. They only last a few minutes, so you can't make an entire movie about going through one. They're unpredictable, so you can't build on the suspense of knowing one's on the way. And they're all or nothing - you're either wiped out or spared, so there's not much aftermath to go through, either. It's tough to build a screenplay around that.

Twister takes tornados and finally gives them their due, with a little help from computer graphics, to show their awesome power and mystery. The filmmakers came up with the good idea to focus on tornado chasers; people who seem to deny every ounce of common sense by heading into a tornado instead of away from it. It was a good idea; surely two hours could be devoted to how these people succeed and survive their fascination. And now, with computer effects at the level they are, the tornados can be produced on screen with amazing power. Unfortunately, the story gets choked with cliches and hokey dialogue that kills the excitement the awesome tornados produce whenever they get center stage.

I'm not really sure why Twister fails so badly when it comes to its screenplay. The producers brought in top-notch effects, very charismatic actors, and even the big name of Michael Crichton for the screenplay. But the story and the dialogue are horrible. Jo (Helen Hunt) and Bill (Bill Paxton) try to find tornados and get as close to them as possible to gather data, so that perhaps someday they'll know enough to predict tornados with more accuracy, and give people more warning when they're about to hit.

But Bill is not really a tornado chaser any more. He and Jo were married, but are now in the final stages of divorce. He's left Jo and their team of wild chasers, but he's returned one last time - with new fiancee in tow - to get the divorce papers signed. This was the first sign of trouble; the old "No, I'm not back, maybe just this once," routine was already looming on the horizon. So, too, was flimsy excuse of the fiancee to easily explain what the chasers are doing to a newcomer and, coincidentally, the audience.

The story really dives into the cellars, though, with the appearance of a rival group of tornado chasers, led by Jonas (Cary Elwes, with the worst disappearing-reappearing accent since Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves). Bill grimly explains to the convenient fiancee that these are the bad guys, because they have corporate sponsorship and are looking for profit out of predicting tornados. I'm not sure where the big money would be in understanding tornados, or why such sponsorship is such a sin. It was the worst exposition I've seen on film in a long time. You can even tell Jonas's crew are the bad guys, just in case you missed the point, because they all drive identical black trucks. There was absolutely no reason to add these antagonists into the story; the showdown with the power of the tornados should have been enough. But in this storyline, the additional crutch gets added, to the film's detriment.

So we end up with a roller-coaster ride, just like the ads promise, except that it's a ride between the highs of seeing some pretty incredible effects and the lows of amazingly bad dialogue. If the concept of tornados doesn't make your heart skip a beat, don't bother going anywhere near this movie. If you feel the fascination with them, or just enjoy wild special effects, Twister is still worth catching in a cheap house. Just steel yourself for the poor scenes you have to endure between tornado shots.

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